Anxiety

I can feel it rising...and there isn't anything I can do right now to stop it. It would help if one of our "Roommates" would take care of his responsibilities and pay his share of rent, do his dirty dishes, help to try and keep the power bill down and /or help pay it. It's not fair for Justin and I to be paying for EVERYTHING. We have our own bills. This person hasn't had a job for 4 months now. Isn't looking for one either, and just doesn't care. We've had to start asking for help with food, because without that help, we wouldn't have food to eat. Next month is going to be worse, Justin's unemployment got cut and that is not helping us at all right now. I'm wondering if it's going to come down to us having to pack up and move....Again....Not what I want. I just want this one person to pay the money they owe, including the 105 dollars in late fees that hac accrued, because of this person, and I want them to leave, be gone and out of mine, my Husband's and my sister's lives forever! All this person has done is cause Drama, with a capital D, hurt and stress! Nothing good has come from this person living with us. We have cut our spending, we haven't gone out to eat or out in general in I don't know how long, we don't drive if we don't have to, we're getting rid of HBO and Showtime, since we have movies we can watch...I guess... all of our money goes to paying bills. Not to mention, Justin has court coming up about his DUI on Tuesday. I'm hoping they drop the charges and give us our $700 dollars back! It's BS that the Justice System will let things like that happen! If they don't drop the charges we are going to fight it and end up having to pay $2000 for a lawyer... I have to tell myself, somehow I guess it could be worse, but right now, I don't know how. I am praying and crossing my fingers that Justin gets called back to work Elevators very very soon. That would be the only thing that could save us right now.. I cry nearly everyday lately because of this crap in our lives. We're 21 and 23, why are we being subjected to this?? Why is a 32 year old man living off his Niece and her Husband??! I know one day he will get it coming back to him, but that day can't come soon enough! I also would like to just say how much I love my Husband. He rubbed my back last night until I had calmed down enough to fall alseep. He is my Love, My Husband, My Best Friend, My Everything! I don't know what I would do without him.

Feeling the Stress

I'm trying to get us back on track money wise, however, it's not easy where Justin has been laid off since July. I don't make enough to pay all of the bills, put gas in the cars, AND put food on the table... Justin is getting unemployement, but it isn't helping enough. To top it all off, the Credit Union that Justin's car loan is through, only took our payment down 63 dollars when we asked to be put on a Hardship program. I don't know how to deal with this stress that just keeps building up. I'm having such a hard time right now. I make a considerable hourly wage, which I absolutely LOVE my job, but we have never really been able to catch up on bills since Justin has been laid off periodically within the last 3 years. We haven't been able to have a Christmas for the last 3 years because, Justin has been laid off all 3 Christmases. I make too much for us to be able to get food stamps by like 50 bucks. Can you please tell me how sooo many other people that aren't Americans, are able to live off of the government and yet, us Americans can't get help hardly anywhere??! I am excited to go on our Honeymoon in a little over a week, but we won't have extra money to do anything except stay at the hotel and lay on the beach. I guess it is good enough to just get away from everything, and relax, but Reality will still be waiting for us when we get back. Which does nothing to help my stress level that is continually rising. I feel like Justin and I are so taken advantage of at home because he may not be working, but has always been right on top of unemployment if he knew it was close for him to be laid off, there are others that are supposed to be paying rent and we have to pick up their slack just to keep a roof over our heads, let alone pay for their toilet paper and food, as well as the water they use and the electricity they use. Tell me, am I wrong for feeling so much more grown up and responsible than these other people?? I almost can't wait unti our lease is up so that Justin and I can go get a place all to ourselves again and not feel the NEED to depend on other people in order for bills to be paid on time. These other people complain like they are having to shell out so much cash for having a roof over their heads and food to eat, when Justin and I have taken on a lot more money coming out of our pocket since our previous roommates left. It's really starting to get to me and irritate me. I have horrible headaches because of stressing so bad (that only said because I know it's not from being dehydrated because I have been making sure I drink TONS of water lately.) What is your opinions? Please, any advice is greatly welcomed!!

Just Married(Preview)

My name is Sharistan, I am 21 years old, and I just married my best friend and man of my dreams, Justin, on July 15th! We are trying the best we can to make a good life together. We have lived with each other for a majority of our relationship, nearly 4 and a half years, so marriage doesn't seem any different to us. Justin is an apprentice for the union elevator companies. When he's working, we live a comfortable lifestyle. He has been laid off the last 3 Christmases in a row... and was laid off a week after our wedding. I have consistantly had a job (or two). I work at Western Governors University currently and LOVE it!! Once we get a few of our bills paid off, I will continue my education with Salt Lake Community College for an Associates Degree in Criminal Justice. I then want to get my Bachelors in Accounting from my work. We have been through some pretty rough times, this time is by far the worst though. However, I think of it as, we can only go up from here, things will not get worse. :)  We are excited though to go on our Honeymoon (Finally...) in October, to Cancun for one week. Paradise can't come fast enough! Well, that's about all I can think of for now...but this was only a preview of our life together. Hope you enjoy!